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Archived Answers.
Answers
to older Email questions.
Only messages received within the last six months are posted
on the Answers page. Older messages will be kept
here in the Archive.
Q: (18 Feb 1999) Thank you
for providing this website. I teach ESL and one problem my students have
told me about is the different ways that we do math. My adult students
are very concerned because they cannot help their children with their homework.
This cultural math problem is compounded by the differences in the reform
math curriculum that the public schools are adopting.
In the higher level math classes, the curriculum has been changed to be
more language based. It used to be that math was an equalizing subject
where everyone could do the numbers. Now, non-native students are at a
distinct disadvantage. I teach the parents. What can you recommend for
parents who want to help their children succeed in school?
A: Thank you for your
e-mail. It is a very important issue. I recommend that parents support
their children by communicating with them and exploring the different styles
of learning that their children have. Parents must command all of the resources
that they have to help their children. They must provide a safe environment
and help to make learning a positive experience. Parents must communicate
directly with children and the teachers. Parents should look for help when
they feel there is a problem, they needn't wait for visible demonstrations
or a crisis to develop. Most importantly, do all these things in a consistent
manner, not just when the child is in trouble.
Make sure that teachers know about your child's way of learning and his/her
strengths. Many parents may not know how to help their children, some of
them may not know that they have access to resources which may be helpful
to them--such as a school psychiatrist or counselor. Parents need to be
involved with the school and be aware of the process of learning imposed
upon their children.
Sometimes it is difficult; but it is always necessary to believe in your
child, value them, have patience, and be a good role model for them.
Q:(11 Feb 1999) DEAR CARMEN,
HI I WANT TO START SOME SORT OF COMMITIE FOR HISPAICS FOR MY SCHOOL. HOW
SHOULD I START IT OR WHAT SHOULD I RESEARCH?
A: Dear Committee Organizer,
Congratulations for such great idea. First, what type of committee do you
want to start? You need to define the goals and objectives of the committee.
Look for a counselor or a teacher that would like to work with you in this
process. The best idea is to write a small proposal about the goals and
activities that you would like to develop, who will be involved, where
you will meet, and when. You might also have the school librarian or local
public library help you find out if there are other local or national organizations
that you could be a part of or use as an example for your committee. Bravo
for such a good idea. Keep up the good work!
Q:(14 Dec 1998) This website
is COOLA-RAMA, how many times do you update this information. Do you have
a chat site yet that would be so awsome.
A:We're glad you find
the site cool. We update the site about every four months. We're trying
to be better at this; but it's hard to keep up with everything. Amigos
is only one small part of the many things that we do. We don't have a chat
site. We thought about having chats on specific topics; but have never
made it that far yet. There is a list
of email, keypal, and chat sites that might get you started. By now
you probably are aware of the potential dangers lurking out there on the
Internet; so be careful not to give out any personal information if you
decide to participate. Cordially, Linda H.
Q:(14 Dec 1998) 1.Why
aren't there more bilingual internet sites currently on the web? 2. How
can we see to it in the future that the internet access will be free to
all people to allow under privleged people to participate?
A:1. When I made my first
Spanish language webpage (Algunos
Lugares en Español), there were very few Spanish language websites.
The number of websites in Spanish has grown tremendously since then and
especially in the last year or so. Unfortunately, I do not speak any other
languages, therefore, I have not investigated any other bilingual sites.
Dr. Guanipa speaks fluent French; but we have never considered doing a
French site as Spanish seems to be more popular.
2. This is a wonderful question. Many places, like public libraries and
schools, are trying to make access to the Internet available for free.
Some places, like coffee shops and cafes, have a sort-of "pay per
view" system. In general, people are not charged to use the Internet;
but are charged by the service provider which links them to the Internet.
In the next few years, we will see all kinds of changes in the way that
we access the Internet, television, and other forms of media. I hope that
you, and others like you, will continue to think about the needs of the
under-privileged so that no one gets left out. Stay informed and vote!
Sincerely, Linda H.
Q: Hi, my name is Brian,
im a Mexican-Ameican teen, and I have some trouble finding information
for my research paper. I have a senior english class research paper to
do. My first draft was really bad, and earned a poor grade. The topic of
my research paper is Latino Success. It focuses on the Hispanic American
community, which includes statistics, history and success stories of Hispanic
Americans in this country. I am however, finding it hard to find sources.
Could you help me find some resources on the web that I can use as sources
to help me in my research paper?? I need at least 6 sources, and they have
to relate to the topic of Latino Success in the United States.
A: We have two different
web based resources which might help you find good information about Hispanics
and Latino success. I recommend that you explore Algunos
Lugares en Español (http://www.kn.pacbell.com/wired/Algunos)
and Hot Internet Sites
en Español. These will provide links to magazines, newspapers,
and other sources. You should also check your local public library. The
Reference librarian can help you find information that is not available
on the Internet. Good Luck, Linda H.
Q: Can you tell me something
about your company? What is your company's goal? Why are you asking students
to help instead of adults?
A: Dear Amigos user, Thank
you very much for contacting us and asking these questions.
Thanks again and please keep in touch, The Amigos Team.
Q: I am from Malaysia,
a nice little warm friendly country in the South East Asia Region. I have
a query on my nick. I have been using this nick[name] for quite some time
and ain't knowing the real meaning behind it. It get quite embarasing when
being questioned by friends. My nick is NINOAMIGO. Well, amigo means friend.
Your help is appreciate.
A:Ninoamigo means "Baby
Friend." The phrase is Niñoamigos. Because some computers do
not have the "ñ," people write nino for niño. I
hope this is helpful. If you need further information, please do not hesitate
to contact Amigos.
Q: I'd like to know which
one is correct, sweet 16 or 17?
A:For the American culture,
it's sweet 16. For Hispanics, the celebration is usually at 15. The expresssion
and the meaning are different according to the culture. Both mean a new
maturity and that you are able to assume new responsibilities. It means
that you have the capacity to make the right choices. You have family and
friends with whom you can talk and receive support if you are confused.
You might also consult your counselor at school if making choices is hard.
Enjoy this age. Take care of yourself and make good decisions for you and
your family. Keep in touch if you have other questions.
Q: Are Hispanic/Anglo
intermarriages common? How do their families differ?
A: Thank you for asking
Amigos this important question. Yes, intercultural marriages are becoming
more common everyday in our society. We feel that ALL families are unique
and different whether or not an intercultural marriage is involved. There
are many advantages to having the knowledge and experiences of two, or
more, cultures--exposure to multiple languages, celebrating different cultural
holidays/events, the richness of experiences and different means of expressing
love. There may also be unique challenges in being in an intercultural
family. There may be differences of traditions, in the way that the parents
were raised, and how each would like to parent their own children. But,
just like couples of the same culture, ways can be reached concerning the
rules of the family. Challenges of reaching agreement concern how the family
will communicate, celebrate, budget, show affection, rear children, etc.,
and are faced by all new families regardless of the culture(s) involved.
It is important for each member of the newly merged family to feel included
and respected within the formation of the rules of the family.
Some of the problems that come from intermarriage families is that some
people may use culture as a way to hide the real problem (intimacy, lack
of communication, etc.) However this also happens in people of the same
culture who blame their family of origin for the problem that they are
facing in the new family. As you see, intercultural marriages have similar
problems as monocultural marriages from the same ethnic group. I hope this
answers part of your question. I will be glad to send you information about
the topic.
Thanks for contacting us and please keep in touch.
Dr. Carmen Guanipa
Q: I am a concerned girlfriend
that found your web page on the internet and was wondering if my problem
is major and if it can be resolved. My boyfriend was brought up in a home
where he had a mother, father, and sister, but the mother and father do
not speak AT ALL. If they speak at all, they say "You're so stupid.."
I honestly think that my boyfriend thinks this is normal or he's too afraid
to express to me that it hurts him. He says that it has been like that
every since he was born and he has learned from his father to just blow
things off and to not them bother you. The problem is with our relationship.
We've been going out for 3 years and at the beginning he was always open
and honest with me. Now he doesn't communicate his feelings. He doesn't
tell me how he feels about me, which in turn has given me a self esteem
problem. He never says how much he loves me, he just says "I just
love you", he also doesn't share how he feels about me (looks, intelligence....etc.).
He is a wonderful person and I don't want our relationship to end, but
I can't live life feeling like I am not needed or appreciated. I just want
a simple response....am I the one with a problem....am I being stupid about
this entire thing????? Please respond!!!
A: Thank you very much
for contacting Amigos with such an important question. We want to congratulate
you for trying to look at issues that can affect your relationship. It
is important to understand your partner in the context of his family history.
We applaud your efforts.
You asked us whether we feel that your problem is major and if it can be
resolved. The Amigos Team believes that most problems can be resolved.
You have brought up several issues: 1) your boyfriend's behavior, 2) your
fear that he may believe that not speaking is normal behavior, and 3) your
concerns about not feeling that you are needed or appreciated. These three
issues are very essential for healthy communication between partners. Please
look at the "Carmen Says" page where we have posted information
about achieving better
communication in couples' relationships.
It is important to understand your partner in the context of his family
history. Each person has a specific way of expressing appreciation and
love for their partner. An expression of love is not only represented by
what a person says, but also by the behaviors and actions displayed by
each other. We invite you to look at your boyfriend's behavior and see
the ways in which he attempts to show you that he cares for you. His way
of expressing appreciation and love may be different from what you may
have chosen or expected; but ultimately the intended message can be the
one desired. We also believe that it is very important to communicate with
your partner about new ways that you would like to behave in the relationship
you have with each other. You may consider discussing this with him in
order to establish acceptable ways of relating to one another. It is very
important to have mutual agreement in how you both would like your relationship
to work.
The other issue you talked about is your feeling about being unappreciated
and unneeded. Perhaps you would like to access professional help offered
within your community. By using these resources, you may find new ways
for feeling appreciated and valued both within your relationship and on
your own. By building a relationship with a counselor, you will be able
to more directly address the feelings that you have expressed to us. Please
look at the resources available to you on the Amigos website under Resources.
We hope that this information is helpful to you. Please keep in touch with
us. We wish you all the best in your relationship.
Sincerely,
Dr. Carmen Guanipa
Q: I am a teacher of the
Spanish language at a high school in Missouri. I would like to know if
you think your website would be a place where my students could contact
other hispanic teenagers and share cultural information?
A: Dear Teacher from Missouri;
We are planning to organize some online activities in the Fall of 1998
with students and also some ISDN-based videoconferences with students,
parents or teachers. Please contact us again and let us know how we can
reach you and keep you informed as we develop the activities. We can also
provide links to others who are promoting communication between students
both foreign and domestic. We will do some investigating and post what
we find on an additional page with links to KeyPal sites since this is
such a common request.
Q:My partner doesn't listen
to me. I keep saying the same things over and over, but he doesn't seem
to understand me. What can I do? Do I have a problem, or does he?
A:First, congratulations
for allowing yourself to be able to look for alternatives for understanding
and dealing with this situation. As in any relationship, communication
is very important for enhancing the interaction between partners. Many
reasons can contribute to the lack of communication between you and your
partner. It is important to be aware that communication is a process of
interaction--two people are involved, and both people contribute in the
development of successes or difficulties.
I want to applaud you for being able to see that relationship problems
have to do with both people in the relationship. Each of you have a responsibility
for seeing what is going on and how you can understand each other better.
This more positive communication can only help to create a more pleasant
life. It is very important to look for help as a couple. Having a safe
place for expressing your feelings and learning to communicate in a healthier
way may be better achieved with the help of a professional.
The professional helper can be neutral when helping you solve difficulties.
Once you learn how to communicate better with your partner, you will be
better able to continue using these new skills when potential problems
come up in the future. Some communication problems are symptoms of more
serious problems. For this reason, it is very important to seek further
help now, before your current communication problems have a chance to grow
into more serious problems.
There are many ways for finding professional help. I recommend that you
check out our list of information and referral sources.
If you are close to San Diego, California, you may want to call or visit
the IFCC Clinic at San
Diego State University. If not, try finding a counseling center closer
to your location, or a communication workshop in your area.
I have provided more
information on communication problems if you are interested in learning
more. Please keep in touch and let us know how things are going.
Respectfully yours,
Dr. Carmen Guanipa
Take Our Survey |
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Home Page |
About this Website
First posted October, 1996.
Last revised September 10, 1999,
by Linda Woods Hyman,
URL: http://edweb.sdsu.edu/people/cguanipa/amigos/archive.htm
Copyright © 1999 Dr. Carmen Guanipa